Yes! I DO!

So here we are, talking groom attire. We have chosen a formal wedding, which is reflected in our dress code. For a formal wedding that mean Morning Suit or Morning Dress during the day, which I discussed in the previous article and White Tie in the evening, which I will discuss in this.

Women should never wear white-tie. Such would be a sever breach of etiquette. Marlene Dietrich could get away with it though.

Formal attire of any kind is often seen as a burden, especially by men. Women on the other hand seem to enjoy the whole process of shopping for that perfect dress, shoes (just another excuse to look for a pair), and accessories. A woman wants to look good on any special occasion. Men on the other hand don’t seem to care most of the time. However the tide is turning. Men’s fashion and health magazines are on the rise and so are men’s clothing stores. Under the influence of icons such as David Beckham, men are encouraged and assured that looking after oneself is not a crime.

In the wedding world that fashion hasn’t penetrated yet however. There is only one groom magazine in the Netherlands, as opposed to at least a dozen for brides and weddings in general. In those magazines men still have a minor role. That is not only the fault of the men, but it will take some male interest in their own weddings to change it. Women spend a lot of time and effort in their appearance during the big day. The least we could do is look the part as well. That doesn’t mean you have to choose a formal wedding as we did, but DO spend some time and effort in your wedding attire.

White Tie is the traditional evening wear. The less formal alternative is Black Tie. Each have their own dress code, although there are more possibilities and variations in Black Tie. The idea of a dress code is to have as little variations as possible. When done well, it makes for a beautiful formal picture. The risk is looking too much like everyone rented there suits in the same place. That doesn’t excuse blue ruffled shirts or pink tuxedo’s though, these have little to do with black tie.

Black Tie is defined as:

A black or midnight blue dinner jacket. It can be either single or double-breasted. Traditionally there are two lapel options; peaked (the most traditional) or shawl, which is more romantic and relaxed. Notched collars come from business suits and are traditionally not part of black tie. Many companies will try to sell these as they are easier to make, but they often look cheaper and less formal as well.

The facing should be sating or grosgrain. It can have either vents or no vents, but without vents is more formal. The black trousers should match the jacket in material, with a single braid along the side in the same material as the facing. When wearing a single breasted jacket the waist should be covered either by a cummerbund or waistcoat in the same material.

Black tie shirts should be white with a piqué or pleated front. The collar can be wing collar, although this is now becoming more and more a part of white tie, or turn-down. A French cuff for cufflinks finish the shirt. Black Tie is finished by a Black Tie [sic!] and black patent or highly polished shoes. Accessories include black or white silk suspenders, cufflinks, a white silk or linen handkerchief. In summer or tropical climates a white or ivory jacket is possible as well.


White Tie

White Tie is even more conventional, especially where cut of coat, vest and collar are concerned. The Coat (Cul-de-Pie in French)is the most visible part of white tie. Black wool is the norm but midnight blue is equally correct (although less traditional, this colour was worn by the Duke of Windsor). The front of the coat ends slightly below the waist and tails fall behind the knees or just slightly below. There is only one kind of lapel which are peaked lapels faced in satin or grosgrain, the latter considered more refined. The buttons ought to be faced in the same fabric as lapel facings. Trousers colour and material should match coat with two narrow stripes or one wide stripe of satin, grosgrain or braid along seams They should be cut for suspenders; high enough rise for waistband to be covered by short waistcoat.

The full-dress waistcoat features a deep V-shaped opening. It requires precise tailoring as it must be cut low enough that it does not extend below the bottom of the tailcoat’s front yet long enough to cover the trouser waistband (Don’t be like Bush and wear your waistcoat so it extends below the coat). You have a little leeway with the vest. While it must be white cotton pique, and low in front, it can be either single- or double-breasted. Vive la difference!

Like the bottoms of the waistcoat's fronts, the bottoms of the revers (lapels) can also be square-cut or rounded although points are the most common. Unlike jackets, formal waistcoats do not have collars that attach to their lapels. The single-breasted model closes with three buttons while the double-breasted version usually takes four buttons. The buttons are self-faced in piqué or they can be replaced with formal waistcoat studs.

Next to the tailcoat, the full-dress shirt is arguably the most important component in creating White Tie's regal bearing. The shirt must be a white wing collar shirt with a stiff front: no ruffles or pleats. The classic full-dress shirt commands a military-like formality with a stiff and simple bosom made from plain linen, plain cotton or piqué (marcella in the UK). This bib-shaped double layer of fabric is heavily starched which can cause the shirtfront to billow out like a sail when the wearer sits down and the excess material has nowhere else to go. In order to avoid this conundrum, the properly tailored bosom is designed to end just above the trouser waist and just inside the suspenders.

The collar of the full-dress formal shirt is distinguished not just by its folded wings but also by its height. Originally, these detachable wing collars stood nearly as high as the wearer's jaw line and even today they should extend at least three quarters of an inch above the coat collar. This most formal style of shirt takes stiff barrel cuffs as they, like the collar's height, were intended to show more than the softer French-style double cuffs. These cuffs are intended to be fastened with links instead of buttons. They are made of plain linen or cotton or they can be in piqué to match the shirt’s bosom.

The tie must be a white pique bow. No exceptions—ever. This is important. One of the ways that the British aristocracy used to remind servants of their place was to force them to dress in formal clothes that were similar, but just different. This was most often accomplished by making them pair the wrong garments together. For instance, a black tie with a tailcoat. That just screams “waiter!

Shoes should be black pumps or pain-toed oxfords of either patent leather or highly polished calf leather. The hat should be a black silk top hat which may be collapsible - a tradition which arose from the fact that opera houses traditionally lacked a cloak room to hand in a top hat. The overcoat should be a dark Chesterfield overcoat, Inverness cloak, or an opera cloak. White gloves were traditionally considered essential. A silk scarf and cane are optional extras.

Although female dress is not as formally codified as that of men, where white tie is prescribed women are generally expected to wear full-length dresses such as ball gowns. Depending on the formality of the event, bare shoulders may or may not be acceptable. Shawls and long gloves are common accessories. At the most formal balls, ball gowns are often required to be white. At hunt balls, gowns are often required to be black, white, silver or gold.

-R-